How to Ask Venues, Vendors, and Friends For Anything For Your Wedding

We know asking for what you want can be tough. But when it comes to sticking to your wedding budget, it’s a must. After all, how else will you ensure you wake up on day 1 of your marriage with some money left in the bank?

These scripts can help you tremendously. Just ask and you shall receive! Know that you won’t always get a yes on the first call, so be prepared to call up to 12-20 places until you find what fits your needs and budget.

Make a commitment to your budget and prepare to get creative and ask around. You’d be surprised what you can get, sometimes for free!

Non Traditional Venues Like Parks, Parking Lots, etc:

Wording to use when you call a park:

“I need a space for a [small/medium/large] gathering. Can I make a reservation? What is the cost and how long can we reserve it for?”

Keep calling different parks until you get one in your budget.

Wording to use when you reserving a parking lot:

“I’m looking for space to host a car parade/drive-in gathering/tailgate event on [date]. Is it possible to reserve the [lot or building name] parking lot for about xx hours? What is the cost?”

Keep calling until you find a few in your budget, then drive by them and pick the one you like best.

Asking a friend or family member to officiate, make food or bake a cake

Wording to use when you ask a friend or family member to officiate your wedding:

“We’re so excited you’ll be part of our big day! We had the idea that our wedding should be officiated by someone close to us, would you consider being the person to marry us? It’s totally ok to say no if it doesn’t feel right to you.”

Then have a conversation. Let them ask questions like how long the ceremony will be, when and where? Tell them all the info you have, and ask them what they would wish for. For example if you’re having a destination wedding and that person can’t or won’t fly, they wouldn’t be the right fit.

Wording to use when you ask a friend or family member to bake a cake:

“We’re so excited you’ll be part of our big day! We had the idea that our wedding cake should be baked with love by someone close to us. A simple cake [give some details like a bundt, two-layer, sheet, etc]. Is that something you would be interested in taking on? We can provide ingredients. And it’s totally ok to say no.”

If the person doesn’t seem thrilled, gently let them know it’s ok, you’re truly happy they will be there on your wedding day, and call the next person. Keep asking until you find someone genuinely excited!

Wording to use when you ask a friend or family member to cook for your wedding:

We only recommend asking friends or family to provide food if you’re throwing a potluck style event for a smaller group (under 60).

“We’re so excited you’ll be part of our big day! We had the idea that we’d ask some really good chefs like you to bring a potluck dish baked with love. A simple dish/entree [give some details like a casserole, appetizers, meat dish, etc. ]. Is that something you would be interested in taking on? We can cover the cost of ingredients. And it’s totally ok to say no.”

Again, if the person doesn’t seem thrilled, gently let them know it’s ok, you’re truly happy they will be there on your wedding day, and call the next person. Keep asking until you find someone genuinely excited!

If you have a friend or family member that runs a catering business, you’ll want to treat them like a professional and pay them the going rate. If they offer to cut you a deal, be aware there are hard costs involved in catering like paying staff and all the ingredients and make sure you’re covering those at least.

Wording to use when calling restaurants and venues

Wording to use when you negotiate a large dinner party with a restaurant:

“I’m looking to host a dinner party for [xx number of people] at your restaurant. Do you have a pre-priced menu including drinks and dessert? We have about $xx in the budget.”

If you can’t find a restaurant within that budget, ask how many they can host at that price. Keep calling different restaurants until you find a match! You don’t have to mention it’s for a wedding reception, but you will want to make sure they will cut a cake that you bring in, how they handle bringing in outside wine (corkage fees?), and any other special considerations. You’ll also want to know if you’ll be the only party at that time, what if any entertainment is booked for that time and any other events happening at the same time.

Wording to use when looking for a wedding venue:

Be prepared to call LOTS of venues until you find a match. More important than the perfect setting is that they can accommodate your number of guests on your budget. After all, the fun of your big day is had with the people who attend.

“I’m looking to host an event for [xx number of people] at your venue. Do you have availability on [date]? Do you require we purchase food and drinks through you or can we bring our own catering and bar? Do you have a pre-priced menu including drinks and dessert? We have about $xx in the budget. How many people can we host for that?”

Keep calling until you find a few in your budget, then drive by them and pick the one you like best. Is there a certain vendor you need wording for? Let us know in the comments!